Campfire Pizza Sandwich

As some of you know, I've been under a great deal of stress the last year. So perhaps we should talk about stress and MS?
Many people experience bodily woes when under stress. Things like headaches, nausea and general aches are considered normal reactions to internal stressors. People with MS don't have any escape from this human ailment. Some even argue that their symptoms of MS get worse when the are stressed out. The thing is...while I completely agree with that theory... deep down I also know that there isn't any real evidence proving MS is made worse by stress alone.

It's hard to remember that sometimes.

It's also hard not to stress about current stress levels. You know that circle right? You worry about being sick even though you are not sick which sometimes manages to make you sick.  UGH!

Shortly after my diagnosis I received a long-winded letter from a family member saying that I had given myself MS because of the stress I put myself through. While I know that is not true, it's hard not to wonder if I could have done things differently.

Did I GIVE myself MS?

There is a great article that I found through the MS Society website that I recommend you read. Even if you don't have MS, my guess is that you either know someone (or will one day) and they'll benefit from your wisdom, or at least your kindness.
And for heavens sake, take this lesson to heart: Even if you are 200% certain that someone caused themselves to have a serious illness, do not rub that in their face. I don't care if you know for a fact that the reason they grew a tiny baby arm out of their back is because of the summer the spent swimming in the glowing pond. Do NOT write them a letter about how it is so clearly their fault.

{le sigh}

So back to why you are here...

I knew (as did EVERYONE around me) that it was time for a break. And thanks to the generous friends in my life I was able to run away for the weekend. No kid. No dog. No grown up worries.

It was glorious!! I love camping, and the feeling of freedom that comes with it. Without proper planning it can be difficult to eat responsibly while away from home. Here is one of my favorite camping recipes that can be adjusted for everyone in your group.

Campfire Pizza Sandwich

Take your whole wheat sandwich thins or whole wheat English muffins (or similar vessel that meets your health needs), split it in half and place on heavy duty tinfoil. Apply a layer of marinara or spaghetti sauce to each side.

Add your toppings. We chose turkey pepperoni and reduce fat mozzarella.

Fold together....like a sandwich.

Wrap in tinfoil.

Place away from the flames on some hot coals or on a grill grate. Flip occasionally and cook until too hot to handle. USE YOUR TONGS to remove it. PLEASE!

Peel apart and enjoy.... or eat like a sandwich.

This picture here is with a regular English muffin because I INHALED my whole wheat one.  I left it to show how easy it is to modify this dish for the whole family. After all, when on vacation stressing about food is simply not allowed.

By the way, my favorite way to de-stress is to spend some time by the water. I love how it helps me slow down and re-prioritize.

Regardless of the connection between MS and stress, we should all be doing things to help us cope better under pressure.
 What do you do to de-stress?

Walk MS 2012

This weekend I had the honor of leading a team for Walk MS South Sound. This came on the anniversary of my one year mark with MS. Around the middle of April last year was when my first episode began. It was a scary few months that followed and I wanted to start the anniversary of that event off on a positive note. Thanks to the work of my teammates we won a tent on team row and several people were able to learn more about the Swank Diet.
Here are a few photos from the event.

Posing with The Monkey. How cool are those orange frames?!

Sharing information about the Swank Diet.

This one tugs at the heart strings for me.

I just had to have my picture taken with our virtual walkers.
We drew them on balloons so they could join us on the walk.

Look at that view!!

This viewing spot was the perfect place for a rest on our trek up the big hill.

Thanks again to everyone that donated and joined me for the journey. It was an incredible experience.

Smoked Salmon Hash with Dill Vinaigrette

Dinner for our blogger Irish Night was a challenge for me. It was hard to think of something traditional and also suitable for someone with my dietary restrictions. No white at night removes the staple potato from the mash-up. Get it? Mash up! Also, the traditional dishes use a lot of pork and beef.
I was going to make a lovely Colcannon when it hit me. Just because the clock says dinner doesn't mean the tummy can't scream for breakfast!!




Truthfully this wandered a little farther from the traditional Corned Beef and Hash that I was first envisioning. After a fair amount of research I've also learned that Corned Beef Hash actually has roots in Northern England. Oops. So while this doesn't represent St. Patty's Day very well, it was delicious enough to share anyway.
Bree from Three and a Half Stones to Go took the prize for Irish Night. Her version of Shepherds Pie was amazing and my 4 year old is still asking for more of it.

Smoked Salmon Hash with Dill Vinaigrette

Dill Vinaigrette:
2 tablespoons white wine vinegar
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 stalks green onion
2 cloves garlic
4 tablespoons fresh dill
1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
salt and pepper to taste
Place vinegar, lemon juice, green onion, dill, garlic, salt and pepper in a blender and blend until smooth. With the motor running, slowly add the oil until emulsified. Transfer the vinaigrette to a bowl or squeeze bottle.

Smoked Salmon Hash
8 ounces smoked salmon, flaked
1 red bell pepper, diced
2 large sweet potatoes, diced
2 tablespoons horseradish
2 tablespoon chopped fresh dill
2 cups chopped kale
1 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
4 poached eggs or cooked egg whites

Heat olive oil in a large, nonstick saute pan. Add the red bell pepper and sweet potatoes. Cook, stirring occasionally until the sweet potatoes are cooked through. Add smoked salmon, horseradish, dill, kale, salt and pepper stir until well mixed. Divide the hash among 4 plates and top each with a poached egg. Drizzle with the vinaigrette.

Moving on to the nutrition...

• The first thing we need to talk about are eggs. Obviously egg whites have no fat. It's that pesky yolk that brings in 5 grams of mostly saturated fat. On the Swank Diet we are allowed three eggs per week, but no more than one per serving.
• So then we go on to Salmon. Fatty fish contains unsaturated fatty acids and must be counted in your daily oil allowance. You are allowed 50 grams of this unsaturated fatty acid (10 tsp.) per day.
  Salmon, Chinook -- 1 oz. = 1 tsp. oil (5 grams)
  Salmon, Coho -- 2 oz. = 1 tsp. oil (5 grams)
  The majority of people I know are aware of the incredible benefits of salmon, if you are not one of them read this, this, this and especially this.
  Smoked salmon adds a lot of flavor without needing too much. Just watch the sodium because the smoking process adds quite a bit.

So there you have it. It started out brilliantly Irish, and ended as beautiful mix of flavors I didn't think I could have anymore. I absolutely love proving myself wrong!
Have you ever done that with a recipe? Or maybe you proved you actually like something you thought you hated? I'd love to hear your stories!

MS Warlord

I worry a lot more than I used to.
I'm a planner and sometimes MS makes me reluctant to plan.
I HATE that about MS.
How do I plan for an attack that could strike at anytime, with anything?
Maybe my legs will start going again and they've felt weak lately.
I really am I'm worried. Should I start carrying a cane in my car?
After my Reiki massage the lady pointed to problems in my knees.
Maybe that is where it will be.
Maybe it is there now, it feels like something is off.
Maybe it's all in my head.
Then there is this fog. It settles in and basic things like friends and places and life changing events just aren't there anymore. I don't know why it happens or how long will it last and it worries me.
Also, while we're talking about it, why is my nose tingly?
And why does my vision get blurry?
Is it low blood sugar or MS or my thyroid?
Am I'm I just tired and stressed?
Maybe I'm getting a cold.
Do I put too much pressure on being productive and not enough on caring for myself?
Why am I so broken and how can I fix all of this?
Do I need to call the doctor?
I really don't want to call the doctor.
I want to be ok.
No, scratch that! I want to thrive.
I want to be the girl on the cover of magazines proclaimed as the one that beat the shit out of MS and is now helping others do the same. I want to start a war.
A war within myself.
They'll call me the MS warlord.
_______________________________________________________________________

You can support the fight by joining TheyCallMeHypo at the April 14th MS Walk South Sound. If you are near by we'd love to have you join the team, if you are far away please consider being a virtual walker. We've already met our goal this year but are still raising funds. Click here or here to learn more. 

Breakin' the rules

When is it ok to break the rules? Is it ok to cheat on your diet occasionally?
I've convinced myself that enjoying a toasted marshmallow, or allowing portion control to fly out the window occasionally is ok.
90% of the time I follow the Hypo Rules but I allow myself that 10% to enjoy special occasions. Is that wrong? I'm really not sure what to think at this point.

This weekend we stopped at a Mexican restaurant before our long drive home, and a friend made a comment that really stuck. After reading every item in the 6 page menu I was very frustrated. I signaled to the husband that I needed help finding something "safe". That's when the friend chimed in with "Why don't you just cheat like you did last night with the marshmallows?"
Wow...what do you say to that?  I know it was meant to be liberating...like "You are on vacation, relax with all the rules." But it really got me thinking. Obviously cheating is bad. The rules that I follow are there for a reason, but here's how I look at it:

1) Some rules are more important than others. If I don't eat my required veggies and fruits at each meal it will not effect me the way that Pop Rocks and a can of Coke will.

2) Occasionally portions can be thrown out the window. If 90% of the time you follow the strict 1200 calories a day, allowing yourself to splurge is ok every once in a while. Sitting in a restaurant and portioning out food leaves me feeling deprived and jealous and angry. If I go into the meal thinking that I am allowed to eat until I am full like everyone else...well I feel better about my situation. That does not mean that overindulging is ok, however I am guilty of that this weekend as well. (Lesson learned after the most uncomfortable 4 hour car ride ever!)

3) Hypo rules and MS rules are not equal. Both sets of dietary restrictions are important. But if given the choice between a marshmallow (can you tell I love marshmallows) and buttery popcorn. I will choose the marshmallow (I love them sooo much). Breaking a hypo rule will have me feeling different right away...and I know how to fix it. Breaking an MS rule, with red meat, or butter or other fatty food isn't something I feel right away. I avoid those things actively because I do not want to have another MS episode, and because I believe that these changes will make a difference in my long term health. 

4) Use small cheats to avoid big binges. Let's talk about marshmallows again. My willpower could allow me to resist the deliciously toasted gooeyness, but I promise you that my mind will stay on them for weeks. You might be talking to me about family, boy drama or work woes but all I see is a giant talking marshmallow in front of me. It won't take much longer for me to bust out the Weber grill at home and toast till the bag is gone. Same with chips...one hand full can prevent me from sneaking the bag out to the garage for some solitary snacking.

I guess this is all boiling down to tracking and accountability. After the most disappointing weigh-in since starting this new lifestyle I feel the need to prove to people that I follow the rules. I'm aware that I don't need to literally show people what I eat constantly, but it would be nice to say "I am allowed this treat and I can prove it." I was once great about documenting everything I ate, but as I got comfortable with my food choices, I stopped. So back to the tracking I go...but I'd love to know your opinions on diet cheating.

The MS Badge

Oye vay! I finally get my head wrapped around the hypoglycemia lifestyle and now it's changing. After a stressful month of doctors and tests and waiting, I get to add the Multiple Sclerosis Badge to my medical sash. Well...technically I don't get the badge yet. You see, the MRI and the spinal tap confirmed MS but I've only had an isolated episode.

So now I wait and pray the next one isn't bad.  Thankfully I have a great neurologist who isn't pushing me to medicate at this point. If I wanted the medicine, it would involve daily shots of Copaxone. (Ummm...no, not with the estimated 30% success rate. Seriously, would you go to Vegas with those odds?) Instead the doctor suggested that I try the Swank Diet. This is a low saturated fat diet that is backed by a 34-year study of people with MS who followed his diet and how it helped. So I'm thinking, 'Diet? Yeah, I know how to do that, bring it on.'

Here are the rules:

1. Saturated fat should not exceed 15 grams per day
2. Unsaturated fat (oils) should be kept to 20-50 grams per day
3. No red meat or pork for the first year; after that, a maximum of 3 oz. (85 grams) of red meat per week
4. Dairy products must contain 1% or less butterfat
5. No processed foods containing saturated fat
6. A good source of omega-3 (oily fish, cod liver oil, cod liver oil tablets, etc.) along with a multi-vitamin and mineral supplement are recommended daily
7. Wheat, gluten or dairy product quantities are not restricted. But foods which cause allergies or reactions to an MS sufferer should be avoided.

This seemed easy enough at first. However, I quickly learned that I had no idea how much saturated fat was in anything I was eating. The first big change came with my cherished cheese and crackers. They had come to be my safety snack at work, but they can no longer be a regular visitor because of the saturated fat found in most cheeses. That same day my family accidentally tortured me with their dinner of hot dogs and french fries. The meltdown that followed resembled one of a teenager losing her car. "But I LOVE hot dogs, and everyone else gets to eat it. It's not fair!! What am I gonna have nooooow!?"
Clearly I wasn't taking this well. By no means was this like the meltdowns I had when I was diagnosed with reactive hypoglycemia, but it still made the books.

In all fairness, I'm sure that anyone wrapping their head around one restrictive diet, and then having to integrate another has probably had one of these moments. It's confusing and frustrating. Hopefully there isn't anyone out there struggling to learn both of these diets, but in case there are, I will share what I learn as I go. Future recipes will still follow the hypo rules but also be lower in saturated fat, and will be beef and pork free for the year. Perhaps I'm being naive, but if this could help me avoid an episode it is worth the struggle. And perhaps, after a year of this I'll have totally earned a Swank/Hypo Badge.

The short end of the genetics stick

As long as I can remember I've always been a sickly child. My family called me a hypochondriac so often that it could have been my middle name.  They thought I was exaggerating my ailments and I will neither confirm or deny that. (I was a good student, but PE in Middle School is tough for the tubby kids.)

Anyway, the more I think about it...that word haunts me. Anytime I feel an illness or an ailment my first inclination is that I am being a hypochondriac. I don't want people to see me as the girl that cried headache. I don't want people to see me as the girl who is always sick, so I try as hard as I can to suck it up and carry on with life. 

I've joked recently about my 3 week headache and then my week of dizziness and "old lady knee" that wouldn't support me...but it wasn't until the mobility in my arm started to go that I admitted defeat. Ok, ok, it wasn't until my co-workers insisted I was having a stroke that I decided to call the nurse.  After a quick 8 hours in the Emergency Room I was released with medication pumping through my veins for Atypical Migraines.

First off I'd like to say that my symptoms never prompted Migraines under WebMD's list of "WTF could be wrong with you." Instead I got the slew of possible infections and tumors. I'm very well versed in infections, and that other option was too scary to face. I'm not to thrilled about their error. (Dear WebMD, please fix your symptom checker for all the other chicken-shits like me that are too afraid to see a real doctor.)


Next I will admit that regardless of how scary the news could have been I was wrong to wait so long. After the Hypoglycemic diagnosis I became pretty good at telling when my blood sugar was getting low. I learned to distinguish the excited or nervous jitters from the "dang-it, I forgot to eat again" jitters. As much as I want to deny it, the Hypo label helped me listen to my body.

With the three week headache and the partial paralysis I knew something was wrong but couldn't face it. So here I sit, publicly admitting to you all that I am in pain with only a little fear that you'll call me a hypochondriac. (Please be nice.)


I know that I have been given the short end of the genetics stick. Maybe one day I'll blog about all the things wrong with me.  Feel free to email your suggestions so I can censor them as I see fit.

Nerves and Priorities... a quick rant.

I have been soooooo hungry lately...and tired...and this headache is a constant occurrence in my life.
I can blame it on my lack of transportation, and the fact that I haven't had a B-12 injection in 3 weeks. (Side note, in addition to Hashimoto's and being Hypoglycemic I also have Pernicious Anemia and get B-12 injections every 2 weeks. Yes, I'm broken.)
But really, the reality is that I haven't made myself a priority. I do ok in the morning when the desire to do the right thing is strong... but during the rest of the day it slowly unwinds.
Snack times have been few and far between and I find myself moving the carb and protein snack to add in my lunch or dinner. I understand that the purpose is to eat small meals that will sustain me throughout the day, but it is really hard to schedule them. It's easy to make work or friends or family a priority, but how do I make snack time a priority?
Of course, this is much bigger than snack time. My priorities come into play with work outs, and weekend meals and don't even get me started on social events.
So back to the title... the nerves. I realized this week that my follow-up appointment is looming uncomfortably close. I'm not ready. I have NOT been great about following the rules 24/7. I don't think I've lost enough weight to pacify the evil doctor. And every single excuse I have thought of comes down to me not having my priorities in the right place.
I don't want to go.