The short end of the genetics stick

As long as I can remember I've always been a sickly child. My family called me a hypochondriac so often that it could have been my middle name.  They thought I was exaggerating my ailments and I will neither confirm or deny that. (I was a good student, but PE in Middle School is tough for the tubby kids.)

Anyway, the more I think about it...that word haunts me. Anytime I feel an illness or an ailment my first inclination is that I am being a hypochondriac. I don't want people to see me as the girl that cried headache. I don't want people to see me as the girl who is always sick, so I try as hard as I can to suck it up and carry on with life. 

I've joked recently about my 3 week headache and then my week of dizziness and "old lady knee" that wouldn't support me...but it wasn't until the mobility in my arm started to go that I admitted defeat. Ok, ok, it wasn't until my co-workers insisted I was having a stroke that I decided to call the nurse.  After a quick 8 hours in the Emergency Room I was released with medication pumping through my veins for Atypical Migraines.

First off I'd like to say that my symptoms never prompted Migraines under WebMD's list of "WTF could be wrong with you." Instead I got the slew of possible infections and tumors. I'm very well versed in infections, and that other option was too scary to face. I'm not to thrilled about their error. (Dear WebMD, please fix your symptom checker for all the other chicken-shits like me that are too afraid to see a real doctor.)


Next I will admit that regardless of how scary the news could have been I was wrong to wait so long. After the Hypoglycemic diagnosis I became pretty good at telling when my blood sugar was getting low. I learned to distinguish the excited or nervous jitters from the "dang-it, I forgot to eat again" jitters. As much as I want to deny it, the Hypo label helped me listen to my body.

With the three week headache and the partial paralysis I knew something was wrong but couldn't face it. So here I sit, publicly admitting to you all that I am in pain with only a little fear that you'll call me a hypochondriac. (Please be nice.)


I know that I have been given the short end of the genetics stick. Maybe one day I'll blog about all the things wrong with me.  Feel free to email your suggestions so I can censor them as I see fit.

Egg Fail

I meant to write this sooner, but I haven't felt like myself all week, probably getting sick or something. Anyway, the problem with feeling off is that everything else seems to unravel. True to form I had several cooking disasters.
The best one started with the Easter eggs that I hardboiled. I took one to work for lunch only to discover it wasn't hard boiled at all. There was this half cooked, liquidy mess inside the colorful tie-dye shell.
It was awful.
I was annoyed.
Luckily I had a bowl underneath the egg so I was able to catch the eewey gooey contents. In my desperation I raided the fridge at work. Inside I found several packets of mayo and mustard along with relish. And this is how the Hypo Egg Salad was born.

Hypo Egg Salad 
1 failed Easter egg, or a fresh uncooked egg
1 packet of mustard
1 packet fat free mayo
1 packet relish
Crack egg into a microwavable bowl. Scramble the egg with a fork. Add some salt and pepper and microwave for 30 seconds. Remove from microwave and stir, breaking the cooked egg into pieces. Microwave an additional 15-30 seconds or until fully cooked.
Break the cooked egg into chunks and stir in mustard, mayo and relish to taste. I used less than half a packet of mayo, half a packet of mustard and a small blob of relish.
Let it chill in the freezer or eat it warm like I do.
Because I keep a packet of whole wheat tortillas at the office this really was the perfect outcome to an other wise failed lunch.

So I guess my Easter Egg fail wasn't such a bad thing after all.
For a hypoglycemic meal this is pretty great. The egg is my one protein, the mayo is obviously the fat, mustard and relish are free, whole wheat wrap for the carb and some carrots and a grapefruit to round out the meal.
I even made it this weekend for my non-hypoglycemic neighbors, a 3 year old and a picky husband, they all loved it.

Vegetable Mind Games- Return of the Butternut

I've been avoiding it... this vegetable that is actually a starch. I want to like it, but why would I give up pasta and rice to go with this thing instead?

The squash I picked up more than a month ago is still on the floor of my pantry. Not many things, human or otherwise, can say that they are more stubborn than me, but that damn squash has won.
So into the oven it went. Don't be alarmed, I chopped it to bite-sized pieces first.

This revisit was about roasting because I needed something that was warm and comforting.
Easy Roasted Butternut Squash 
1 Butternut Squash
Minimal olive oil
4 tablespoons garlic
4 tablespoons parsley
salt
pepper
Peel and chop squash into evenly sized pieces. Toss with a scant drizzle of olive oil and salt and pepper. You only need enough to barely coat the pieces.
Bake at 425 for about 20 minutes until a fork pierces a piece easily. Remove from oven.
Saute garlic and parsley with 2 tablespoons olive oil so it makes what seems like a paste.
Poor this paste on top of the roasted squash and toss to evenly cover all the pieces. Serve sprinkled with Parmesan cheese.


Obviously I made more than I was allowed to eat when I roasted that, so I had planned on making 2 different versions of Butternut Bisque. Unfortunately (and fortunately) I fell in love with the first one that I made. I immediately made a second serving of the same thing and shared it with the neighbor.

I love this recipe because it is uses a lot of free exchanges.
Curried Butternut Bisque (Hypo Style)

1 cup leftover roasted butternut squash (1 carb)
1 cup water (duh... free exchange)
1 tsp chicken boullion powder (free exchange)
2 tbs shredded unsweetened coconut flake (1 fat)
3 tsp chopped ginger from the jar (free exchange)
1/2 tbs curry (free exchange)
2 tsp cumin (free exchange)
1 tsp olive oil (1 fat)
Combine leftover squash and water in a blender. I used the Magic Bullet and it was indeed magical. Blend until it resembles baby food and there are no visible chunks. Heat the ginger and coconut in olive oil in a small sauce pan for a few minutes.  Pour in the squash blend. Add boullion, curry, cumin and stir until heated through.
Serve with 1 tbs fat free sour cream (free exchange) and enjoy.

Next time I make this for myself I will try to make it a full meal. I think I'll incorporate steamed chicken, carrots, celery and bean sprouts into the mix.  

I already admitted defeat to the Butternut, but I'm actually happy about this.  I finally have a recipe with this mighty foe that is worth sharing. Plus, it is low calorie, and it is a good source of fibre, vitamin C, manganese, magnesium, and potassium. It is also an excellent source of vitamin A and vitamin E.

Pico De Luncho

Some would say that my recent obsession with Pico De Gallo is unhealthy...to that I say "Bullshit, did you read my last blog post?"
It is totally healthy, and remember it is a free exchange.
So I've had this for lunch and snack ummmm... about 4 days in a row. I would be totally willing to eat it for another week straight.

Pico De Wrappo- Hypo Style
1/4 cup Hypo Pico
1 whole wheat tortilla
1 piece string cheese
Shred string cheese evenly over tortilla. Microwave tortilla for 30 seconds or until cheese is fully melted.  Add pico down the middle of the tortilla. Fold up one end and roll like a burrito. Enjoy!

Serve with raw carrots and an orange to meet the 1 carb, 1 veggie, 1 protein, 1 fruit requirement.
This lunch doesn't include the 1 allowed fat, but can you imagine if you threw in a slice of chopped up bacon?! Yum!